deep down into the vast ocean,
what do you see?
for me, the endless stream of colours
that you bring to my sea.
up above in the blue sky,
what do you hear?
for me, the chorus of melodic singing
that you brought me here.
you are my safety zone..
no matter where i roam
my one and only home
and for you, i write this poem.
I hang on to the hope that is woven through your words
but the key to that hope has been thrown in the water of my tears, in which I drown
not only physically but I'm emotionally drained
my heart pounds with too much uncertainty
where do I find that glimmer of hope?
the one that could stop my whole word before it plummets
into a deep despair
It's been almost a year since I've written something on this blog. well, I guess I should make a regular routine out of it and set a specific time to write. At least I have to do it every week or in every 3 days if I didn't have a lot going on.
you know one of the days where you feel like writing your thoughts out loud? in order to not just live it up in your head.. hence, it's the reason why I'm currently here, writing on this blog.
I think this surely could help me ease up my mind and organize the jumbled thoughts in my head.
here's the thing.. I'm actually afraid of getting locked in, having no way out and being stuck to some things for life. it's an unfathomable feeling and pretty much applicable to everything.
we have a profound desire for freedom.
but here's a fact:
life is unpredictable. If it's life, it's unpredictable.
I realized that if I wanted to live the way I wanted, I had to give up a particular outcome because you have to choose one way to cross, to live.
(picture is from bloomberg.com)
you must be thrilled to watch your favorite performers performing live in front of you but there are going to be some disturbance along the way if you weren't careful with a few things. So let me tell you these things that you have to pay your utmost attention to in order to enjoy the concert comfortably.
1. only bring necessary items!
first of all dont bring too much stuff on your bag. Keep it simple and just bring all the necessary items like camera, cash, your phone and ticket!
2. Do a little research about the location and condition of the venue
if you're going to watch a concert in a venue that you've never been or even heard before, i recommend you to do some research about the place via internet or even pay a visit to it to make sure that you're familiar with the place on the day of the concert.
3. Wear comfortable clothes
this point is going to be explained further on another post.. so wait for it!
Last but not least is to..
4. Put away your phones or cameras!
this is the most important point for me, it's ok to take pictures of them once in a while or taking short videos.. but if youre too immerse on taking them you will definitely forget that youre in a concert and not enjoying it. its better to watch it with your own eyes rather than watching it from your phone's or camera's screen right?
written by Ardelia Meizana Zakirah
At first i intended to make this blog as a 'book review' blog.. but after a lot of thinking i kind of reconsidered and chose to not only reviewing book on my blog
that decision is made based on my college life which is sooo busy i barely had time to rest let alone read a fricking book which is an activity that i love so much
but today i decided to do a mini review on one of my favorite books that i've read a long time ago. hm.. maybe like a year ago?
at that time.. when my life wasn't so busy, when everything wasn't insanely tiring (TAKE ME BACK TAKE ME BACK) it usually took 2 to 4 days for me to finish a book but.. not for this one! it was just so good it got me hooked by the first page so i finished it in like one sitting.
i truly couldn't get enough! it is indeed a beautifully written book; the characters, the descriptions and the emotions. oh my god the emotions! my emotions were everywhere at once. Jandy Nelson is an utterly great author and i find it hard to believe that this is her debut novel.
the overall story is about Lennie, a girl whose sister named Bailey suddenly dies of a heart failure and how she goes through grief and loss, her friendship, and also her love life in the expedition to eventually find her self and gets through her sister's death.
Jandy's ways of describing how Lennie felt left behind, the unjustness of her broken life and the guilt and also loneliness at being the one that survived, really touched me in many ways.
there's this one example where Lennie writes on a note:
I
wish
my
shadow
would
get
up
and
walk
beside
me.
those words are heart wrenching that i wouldn't know how to describe loneliness in a better way than that.
i gave this book 4 and a half star. it's lacking by half a star to be a perfect score just because the character simply didn't feel utterly real to me in the end just because i don't think teenagers could talk and think like Lennie and her friends did. but it's not that big of a problem just because a fiction book doesn't have to be logically real.
but still, a highly recommended book!
written by Ardelia Meizana Zakirah
Have you ever had trouble falling asleep?
(source: Emil Johansson' Flickr)
everyone likes ok i mean loves sleeping but there are some people who find it difficult to fall asleep and consider it to be a kind of work instead of time to recharge yourself.
the difficulty itself is caused by different reasons.. whether it's because you're not tired, you're too tired, too much going on in your mind, you slept in during the weekends or are you experiencing insomnia like i do?
i struggle to fall asleep almost every other night that i wish human had the on/off button so i didn't have to go through the process of falling asleep before sleeping ha. but don't worry because I've found ways to overcome insomnia, ways to fall asleep quickly and how to get better sleep
here are the things that worked so far for me
1. Turn off gadgets
gadgets are becoming a part of our lives now that we check it every hour and chances are you also sleep with your gadgets within' arms reach of your bed. simply having those communication devices nearby can lead to tossing and turning. and the thoughts of checking it only makes it harder for you to shut your brain off come bed time
the blue light from the devices tricks your mind into thinking it's day, so disconnecting at least 30 minutes before you sleep will help your brain relax so you'll fall asleep faster.
2. Read a book
read an entertaining or boring book. it helps to get you mind of worries and your to-do list. but stay away from books that required too much thinking though; they rev up your brain.
3. De-stress
worrying keeps you up; learn to take time out to De-stress, both during the day and also before the bed so you can clear your mind.
4. Control the temperature of your room
the temperature of your room might be too hot or too cold for you to fall asleep so adjust it to the right one which is between 18 and 28 celsius degrees to help you get proper sleep.
5. Food
it's not good to go to bed with your stomach too full nor too empty. so have a light dinner because heavy meals make it difficult to digest and indigestion may make it difficult to fall asleep. but hunger also keeps you awake so eat snacks before you go to sleep.
6. Warm shower
a warm shower or bath can soothe muscles and plus it's also great if you're suffering from a cold.
7. Warm beverages
drinking something warm and calming such as milk with honey, hot chocolate or chamomile tea can help you relax your body and mind before bed time but avoid drinking anything with caffeine.
8. Hide the light
laptop, phone, your room's lamp, alarm clocks - all of these can prevent deep sleep so cover up anything that's making it difficult for you to fall asleep.
9. Sleep position
9. Sleep position
sleep position matters. find a comfortable sleep position that supports good sleep posture and make sure every part of your body is comfortable.
10. A fixed sleep cycle
going to bed and waking up at the same times every day helps your body to know when it should get tired, so try to do that everyday. this one is the most difficult one for me to accomplish just because college life is so demanding and making it difficult to stay on the same sleep cycle.
that's it! hope you guys find this post helpful enough to make you easily fall asleep! :)
written by Ardelia Meizana Zakirah
  |
| 2 years ago, i read this book per my friend’s request |
i spent a large
portion of my vacation subjecting myself to read that novel. i probably
looked rather pathetic sitting on the airport's waiting room, bawling my
eyes out through the last 50 pages. the fact that a piece of writing
got me to feel something to that capacity was im not a book crier, im
not a movie crier, and im really not a crier at all in general. this
book brought out something in me i didn't know i could feel.
pain does, in fact, demand to be felt.
thanks john green. (ha i just had to do it)
so naturally, i
read it three more times. totally normal, right? the only other book
i've read that many times was my collection of fairy tale books when i
was a kid. it's not just the story that makes the novel so great. sure,
the undying love between augustus waters and hazel grace is the
definition of perfection, but that's not why i loved the book so it's not just the story that makes the novel so great.
i loved it bceause it's more than just it's story. it's the way hazel thinks-- as a teenager and a person who has cancer. the way she views the world and the way she finds someone that thinks in the same capacity as she does. it's really hazel and augustus's mental connection that makes the story what it is. not only just because the skinship that they shared (too much) on the movie.
so months ago, when i found out that john green (i did it again just because) is planning to make a movie based on the book.. i wasn't happy. i mean it could ruin my imagination about the characters, how they looked like in my head, etc and i didn't look forward to it at all. this morning, my friend gave me a link to watch it online and out of curiousity, i've watched it.
thank god i didn't expect too much because sadly, the movie hardly showed any of the things that i mentioned earlier. but how could it? a movie is not a book. and a book is not a movie. it was like they represented the same story but you don't see the details that give it meaning. like, i think that knowing about augustus's ex girlfriend (caroline. read the book) explained a lot about how he viewed love and illness- and without the part of his story, he seems naive in his pursuit to be closer to hazel.
i loved it bceause it's more than just it's story. it's the way hazel thinks-- as a teenager and a person who has cancer. the way she views the world and the way she finds someone that thinks in the same capacity as she does. it's really hazel and augustus's mental connection that makes the story what it is. not only just because the skinship that they shared (too much) on the movie.
so months ago, when i found out that john green (i did it again just because) is planning to make a movie based on the book.. i wasn't happy. i mean it could ruin my imagination about the characters, how they looked like in my head, etc and i didn't look forward to it at all. this morning, my friend gave me a link to watch it online and out of curiousity, i've watched it.
thank god i didn't expect too much because sadly, the movie hardly showed any of the things that i mentioned earlier. but how could it? a movie is not a book. and a book is not a movie. it was like they represented the same story but you don't see the details that give it meaning. like, i think that knowing about augustus's ex girlfriend (caroline. read the book) explained a lot about how he viewed love and illness- and without the part of his story, he seems naive in his pursuit to be closer to hazel.
(above picture is taken from imdb.com)
overall, the movie was kind of a disappointment (for me). and
its not because they left out scenes or changed some of the words or
because of the casting or antyhing. that's all stuff ic an overlook. it
was simply the feelings that came with it. the beginning was the most
terrible (in my opinion). sure yeah they had good chemistry adn the
whole last half of the movie was really great, but the way they build
their feelings toward each other and the way they fell in love slwoly,
just their thoughts and feeling and the way they connect in the
begnning.... all of that was just lost. even though in terms of a book
to film adaptation it was good and as true to the source material as can
be, it was still lacking "that something" for me.
written by Ardelia Meizana Zakirah
